Travelling In Style

Life’s not meant to be fair – that’s why there’s death, taxes and the global financial crisis. And that’s why I feel like a cheat. I’ve got it easy. I’m in the middle of nowhere – not even my GPS can tell me where I am – but I’m in absolute comfort; climate-controlled, seven speaker stereo-enhanced, drink-at-the-ready tranquility. 

Spectacular View

I’ve decided to climb to the top of Whoota Whoota lookout, a natural viewing platform on the NSW mid-north coast, providing magnificent views of 100km of coastline from Port Macquarie to Port Stephens. It’s about 15 minutes’ drive from our base at Sundowner Tiona Tourist Park and the view is meant to be spectacular.

Easy Does It

The oversized tyres hit the dirt track 10 minutes into the journey and I prepare to be thrown sideways. But the Hummer takes the sizeable lumps and bumps in its stride – the 216mm of ground clearance certainly helps – and silkily powers toward the top of the mountain. 

Made It!

Just as I get comfortable riding high behind the wheel of the beast, with the power-adjustable heated front seats keeping my rear toasty in the cool conditions, I understeer a turn in the road – a cliff-face drop to the left – and I’m forced to slam my foot on the brakes. Responsive, they stop the two-tonne Luxury Auto model in its tracks. I gather my thoughts and ascend to the viewing platform. 

The Scenic Route

But the Hummer isn’t just made for assaults on mountain ranges. She looks just as at home by the water. We take her for a spin along the scenic route – windows down and sunroof open – and park on the boat ramp at Elizabeth Beach for a few quick snaps. We dream of reversing a powerboat we didn’t bring into the water and throwing a line out into the crystal-clear water, before remembering that life isn’t always fair after all.